Uncertainty

If you asked me a month ago about certainty, I would have told you that while I always have plans, none of them are set in stone. I thought I had learned to hold my plans lightly!!
Some weeks ago, I travelled to the US for a conference. Before I went, I took a photo of my diary. I thought I knew exactly what I would be doing when I returned and had work and social engagements planned into 2021. In the 10 days I was away, everything changed. It has been nothing like my diary predicted it would be. Everything planned for the rest of this year and into next year is now in question.

Pressure on finances

I imagine you can tell similar stories. Nothing is certain anymore.
The current crisis is putting pressure on everyone’s finances.  Clients may be worried about their jobs or their incomes, and they may feel that therapy is more on of a “like to have” than a “must have.” Therapists are having to adapt and do it quickly.
As therapists in private practice we are often on an edge with money whether we are aware of it or not. It is the edge between the clients’ needs and our own. The edge becomes more acute as uncertainty grows.
The edge may ask us: What is my responsibility to my clients in this situation? Is it okay to be concerned about my practice income when clients are struggling with health and other issues? How will I pay my rent and other expenses?
In whatever way the edge turns up, we can reframe the question: “Will I be okay? Can I survive this?”

Is it okay to charge in times like these?

I see this today in threads on social media, some urging therapists and counsellors to offer their services for free, others reacting strongly against the idea that therapy is being undervalued in this way.

How do you meet this issue? Do you feel a strong urge to help those who may be struggling but unable to access resources? Or are you drawn to charging for your work? Does it call up fears of being selfish, of doing, “Me first”? Or the opposite, does it bring out the fighter in you, fighting to prove your worth.
As we know, fear tightens us physically and energetically. Our inside space shrinks, and our fight or flight reaction raises the ghosts of vulnerability and of lack. Fear tells us that we are not safe and that there is not enough for all. 
I’d like to encourage you to inhabit that uncertainty for a moment. Allow yourself to really feel into the shock, the fear, the loss, the anger, the powerlessness, the despair and whatever else you might be feeling. Because beyond those feelings, I think there’s a gift.

We could be wrong…

No matter how well informed we think we are, the truth is we never can see the whole picture of anything. We like to think we can predict the future from our experiences of the present and the past, but we can’t, and this current situation shows us just how little foresight we have.
And this is very scary. Because, as humans, we like to think we are in control.

The gift of not knowing is that good things happen that we don’t foresee. How many times have you had a lovely surprise? How many times has someone given you a gift you didn’t expect? Or an extraordinarily difficult client situation changes unexpectedly? And since this crisis started, haven’t there been many of those moments?

Quarantined in my house, I had a birthday last week. I was really touched by all the people who reached out to me with good wishes, cards and even left gifts at my door! The joy they brought me was all the sweeter because of the challenges of the current crisis.
As we open ourselves to really feeling into what this situation evokes for us, we also open the space to fully let in the joy, the hope, and the support that we may have forgotten was there for us.

If you’re struggling with any aspect of developing your practice, please contact me here to see how I can help you.