The Hidden Value of Action


There are two main schools of thought when it comes to how to do things: that we should get ourselves into alignment with what we want before we take action (or in other words, wait until we feel ready) or that we should take the action anyway. Personally, I move backwards and forwards between these two approaches.

StrengthI’m not a huge fan of “pushing through” the resistance that arises when doing something new, because I believe that approach often creates even more resistance. One of the most powerful things we can do in any situation where we don’t feel ready to move forward, is to allow ourselves to say “NO.” In fact, for me, in developing This Business of Therapy, allowing myself the free choice NOT to do something has been an important tool. There have been times when the logical and rational thing is to take a particular action, but I haven’t done it, purely because it doesn’t feel right. There have also been times when I have gone ahead with something, despite a strong urge not to, because a voice in my head is telling me I should. Usually, when I do that, it doesn’t work out well. On the other hand, I’m aware that if I always wait until I feel ready, I might never do anything.

Returning to horse-riding after an interval of more than forty years was one of those situations where it really wasn’t clear what my feelings were telling me. I had stopped in my early teens after a fall had left me uninjured but severely shocked. After the initial euphoria of the early lessons, my anxiety and panic set in, and I found even the smallest thing could leave me shaking and trembling. A harsh tone from the instructor for a mistake, a bird flying in front of the horse, losing a stirrup or any other small incident felt like a life threatening event, leaving me breathless and terrified. I wanted to keep riding, but my body was giving me very strong signals that it wasn’t safe.

kindness 2I was lucky enough to find an instructor who was herself a therapist, and understood what was happening for me. Although she had never personally experienced such fear in relation to riding a horse, she had experienced it in other walks of life, and she helped me to find a good balance between stretching myself and minding myself. As a result, I was able to learn from what was happening to me, avoiding the most stressful activities, but still able to continue.

Horse riding is a lot like running your own practice. It is a journey of personal development. Each lesson prompted something in me that needed to grow. Building a relationship with the horse is not that much different to building it with another human being. We learn to communicate with each other, and how far we trust each other. We learn each other’s strengths and weaknesses. As I met and encountered something new, it prompted me to grow into the person I needed to be to meet that challenge. I learned a lot about myself, for example, how my muscles tighten when I’m scared, but denying it. I learned what helps to calm me when I start to panic. I learned how my fears affected my horse, and how my horse’s fears affected me. I learned how far I could go into the panic and still be able to think clearly, and at what stage my fear prevented me from thinking (at which stage I’ve gone too far.)

I might never have learnt these things if I hadn’t persisted, and this is why I am a fan of taking action, and particularly, supported action. Through supported action we meet those parts of ourselves that are crying out to be healed, and we have the support to let that healing take place. Whether that action involves something we do to grow our business or whether it’s something we do for pleasure, when we meet something that challenges us and we expand as a result, our business benefits.

What action could you take today that could help you to grow into the person your practice needs you to be? Are there things you’d like to do, but don’t yet feel ready for? And what support do you need in order to take that action? If you’re not sure where to go next, perhaps you could try my Therapy Practice Five Day Challenge to get the creative juices flowing.

As always, if I can help you with this I’d be glad to do so. Contact me here for you free 20 minute consultation, or to make an appointment.