Tag: Self Care

Be Kind to Yourself

Without fail, whenever I talk to therapists about issues they have with running their practices, they will say, “I just don’t understand why I find it so hard. I know I do good work. I sit in front of my clients and I know I can help them. So why is it so hard for me to put myself out there?” And often too, they’ll add, “What is wrong with me?” or “Why can’t I do this?”

Many of us find it easier to motivate ourselves on behalf of others than on our own behalf. kindness 2We find it easier to be positive and confident about our clients’ abilities and potential than about our own. We find it easier to see solutions to the problems of others than we do to our own.

There’s nothing wrong with us. It’s not some major flaw or block that needs fixing, it’s just that we are so engaged in the detail of our own lives, that we can’t see the wood for the trees. We have rehearsed the problems, the reasons, the difficulties so many times, that at some level we believe we can never get past them! We are often attached to our stories about ourselves to the extent that we believe that they are all we are.

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Living (and working?) Intentionally

Some time ago, I attended the funeral of a former work colleague. Throughout the ceremony and afterward, talking to others, one message was repeated, by just about everyone, that her death was premature and unfair. She was forty, and left behind a husband, two children, sisters, work colleagues and friends, by whom she will be sorely missed.faded flower

It wasn’t the first time I’ve been to the funeral of someone younger than me, and it always leaves me with a nagging question, if I knew I were to die soon, would I be living my life any differently? Read more

Self Care at Christmas

At a recent workshop, I was surprised to hear so many speak of the desire to step out of the frantic energy that seems to be around this time of year in the run up to Christmas. My surprise was not just that so many named it, but that I too was feeling it, and I too was glad of the pause.

For some reason this time of year seems to bring out an urgency in us, to buy presents, food and drink, to clean our houses, to 001redecorate, to lose weight, to complete projects, as if it were not just the end of the calendar year, and a holiday period, but the end of our existence as we know it. A death. And indeed, the winter and its solstice is a form of death, the shortest day, more dark than light.

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